San Diego, CA – Megan Dolan, a seasoned writer, actor, and storyteller, is set to present her poignant and humorous solo show, "Not the Right Mom: A Full Spectrum Comedy," at the Poway Center for the Performing Arts on Sunday afternoon, April 26. The performance, scheduled for 4 p.m., offers an intimate and comedic exploration of the challenges, joys, and inherent chaos that accompany raising a son on the autism spectrum.
The 80-minute production, performed without an intermission, delves into the formative experiences of the first year following Dolan’s son’s autism diagnosis at the age of five. Her son is now sixteen. In the show, Dolan employs a pseudonym for her son to protect his privacy, a decision rooted in her commitment to safeguarding his personal life while sharing her own journey. This dedication to privacy, balanced with the need to tell her story, underscores the sensitive nature of her work.
Dolan shared that her son recently attended a live performance of "Not the Right Mom" after having previously seen it on video. His positive reaction, he told her he enjoyed it, was deeply meaningful. "That was really so meaningful to me," Dolan stated, highlighting the profound impact of her son’s validation on her artistic endeavor.
While the show has often found its audience within support groups, educational institutions, and among parents navigating the unique needs of their children, Dolan emphasizes its broader appeal. She believes that anyone with a family member or close acquaintance on the autism spectrum will find resonance within its narrative. "It’s very universal," she explained, suggesting that the show fosters connection by addressing universal themes such as redemption and resilience, all while infusing moments of levity into the often absurd realities of parenting. Dolan further recommended the show for ages 14 and up, noting the inclusion of "well-placed profanity, which every show about parenting needs," adding a touch of relatable authenticity to her recommendation.
A Journey of Storytelling and Resilience
Megan Dolan, 54, is a native of Southern California, having been born and raised in the region. Based in Long Beach, she has cultivated a multifaceted career as a writer, actor, and storyteller. Her academic foundation includes a bachelor’s degree in theater arts from California State University, Long Beach, and she was an integral founding member of the critically acclaimed Elephant Theatre Company. For 17 years, Dolan also facilitated Playfair, an interactive program widely presented during college student orientations across the nation, demonstrating her long-standing commitment to engaging audiences and fostering personal growth through performance.
Her performance credits extend to esteemed venues and festivals, including The Moth, the Hollywood Fringe Festival, the Ojai Storytelling Festival, and Expressing Motherhood. Furthermore, her TEDx talk, "Messy Mommy: A Slob in the Shadows," is available on YouTube, showcasing her ability to connect with audiences on a global scale through digital platforms.
"Not the Right Mom" marks Dolan’s third solo show. Her debut solo work, created in 2000, explored a significant relationship from her twenties that had a lasting impact. Fifteen years later, she presented her second solo production, which focused on the intricacies of life as a mother to two young children. In 2018, "Not the Right Mom" emerged, specifically addressing her experiences with her son’s autism diagnosis and the subsequent journey. This production is notable for Dolan’s portrayal of at least ten distinct characters, including herself, her husband, her daughter, her son, and various other individuals encountered along their path.
Evolution of a Performance and Expanding Reach
After years of performing "Not the Right Mom" in smaller venues, typically with fewer than 100 seats, across Southern California, Dolan had considered concluding the show around April 2024. However, a pivotal suggestion from an audience member to consider performing in larger arts centers, capable of accommodating hundreds, opened up a new chapter for the production. This shift has allowed Dolan to reach significantly wider audiences and explore expanded opportunities.
The transition to larger venues necessitated only minor adjustments. Dolan noted that the adoption of a microphone has been a particularly beneficial enhancement. "That is so incredibly exciting for me, because I do not have to push my voice and can give a more nuanced performance," she explained. While she maintains direct engagement with the audience, especially those in the front rows, she finds the microphone allows for a more controlled and expressive delivery. "It’s different with a microphone… but there is still an intimate feeling because I view the audience as my scene partner," Dolan elaborated, underscoring her commitment to maintaining a personal connection with each attendee.
The staging of "Not the Right Mom" is characterized by a minimalist set and judicious use of props, complemented by projected images on a screen to establish various settings. This approach emphasizes the narrative and Dolan’s performance, allowing the audience’s imagination to fill in the details.
Dolan has found the solo show format to be particularly well-suited to her family life, offering a flexibility that other acting mediums do not. While she has a diverse background in acting, encompassing traditional stage plays, commercials, and film, the solo show allows for independent rehearsal schedules. "I can run lines in the car… or when walking the dog," she noted, highlighting the practical advantages of this performance style for a working parent.
The advantage of writing her own material extends beyond rehearsal flexibility. It allows her to craft dialogue that authentically reflects her voice and experiences, aiding in memorization and ensuring the lines feel natural. "It’s really fun writing for your own voice," Dolan stated. She further elaborated on her selective approach to her career since becoming a mother, noting, "Once I had kids, I was more discerning with what I do and would not just do any show. My own material was juicer than anything I was auditioning for." This personal investment in her creative output has proven to be a significant driving force in her artistic career.
Embracing Vulnerability and Artistic Truth
Dolan has learned to embrace the act of sharing intimate details of her personal life, reframing it as a source of empowerment. "The longer I do a show and own the story, it is not just reliving my life. It is really freeing and fun," she asserted. This process has allowed her to access and express deep emotions during her performances, which she finds incredibly fulfilling as an actor.
When she first presented her inaugural solo show, Dolan was unprepared for the "vulnerability hangover"—the feeling of second-guessing and questioning one’s openness the day after intense personal sharing. However, she developed an effective strategy early on for separating her performances from her daily life, particularly when acquaintances attend her shows and later wish to discuss the material.
While her shows are autobiographical, Dolan acknowledges that she employs artistic license, sometimes heightening certain elements for dramatic effect. "Some things have been heightened for dramatic effect," she admitted, a common practice in narrative performance to enhance emotional impact and thematic clarity. She cites Mike Birbiglia, a stand-up comedian known for his solo shows, as an artist whose work she deeply admires, suggesting a shared appreciation for the power of personal storytelling in a comedic context.
Community Engagement and Expert Insights
In conjunction with "Not the Right Mom," Poway OnStage and Hope on the Hard Road are offering supplementary opportunities for attendees to engage with the themes presented in the show.
Prior to the performance, from 1:30 p.m. to 2:30 p.m., Dolan will facilitate a free writing workshop. This session is designed to guide participants through writing prompts and free-writing exercises, encouraging them to explore personal experiences, share their narratives, and foster connections within a safe and supportive environment. No prior writing experience is necessary, though pre-registration is required.
Following the performance, a brief question-and-answer session will feature Dolan alongside experts in the field. These include Gohar Gyurjyan, Ph.D., Chief Executive Officer of MindWise Psychology Services, and Heath Schauder, Executive Director of Special Education for the Poway Unified School District. This panel aims to provide further context, address audience inquiries, and offer professional insights into the complexities of autism spectrum disorder and its impact on families.
The presentation of "Not the Right Mom" in Poway is more than just a theatrical event; it represents an opportunity for community dialogue, understanding, and shared human experience. Dolan’s willingness to translate her personal journey into a comedic narrative serves as a testament to the power of storytelling to bridge divides, foster empathy, and illuminate the diverse tapestry of family life. The event underscores the growing recognition of the importance of accessible and relatable narratives that reflect the lived experiences of individuals within the neurodiverse community.
